Over the weekend the boys and I were playing in my Mum’s backyard, as we do rather regularly. Little Lion kept pointing to the sky saying, “Get it, get it!” It took me a while to realise he was asking me to get the moon for him.
I tried to capture the moon in a photo but as is always the case it never appears clearly when I take a quick snap on my phone.
I wanted to capture the moment forever though. That sense of trust that only small children have in the ones they love. That the things they imagine can be gotten.
Sometimes, the weight of parenthood feels heavy on my shoulders. I constantly ask myself if I’m doing the right thing for my boys. Are they watching too much TV? Am I teaching them enough? Are they getting enough time with me? How’s their diet? Are they sleeping enough? I question myself about everything really so it’s hardly surprising I over-analyse Mama-hood. I don’t rest on my laurels but nor do I feel completely confident with my choices a lot of the time either. I run by instinct a lot when I answer these questions of myself.
Moments like this remind me that my boys feel safe and loved. That they trust me and don’t expect perfection. Instead, they follow the path I’ve cleared whilst forging their own way too and that over time their path will diverge more from mine.
And, that there was an element of the gorgeous Oliver Jeffers picture book, How to Catch a Star to this moment was not lost on Bebito…as he too understood what his brother was asking he softly spoke, “Yes Mama, can you jump up and grab it?” Life, imitating art. I should worry less.