I’m not a religious person. I don’t really know what I believe actually. I am schooled in religion and know much about various religion. I do believe in energy. It’s a physical law and I think it impacts us emotionally and physically.
When we were in Melbourne a few months ago we spied the amazing piece pictured above in the lobby of the National Gallery of Victoria. It did what all beautiful art (music, writing, painting) does, it’s energy spoke to my soul.
Bebito, a few months shy of 5 was transfixed by it. He lay on the ground on his belly listening to the china clink together and watching the slow movement of the bowls. For once, he asked no questions. It spoke to his soul too. He’s very like me so I wasn’t surprised.
I have come to realise a few things in the last little while. That I will never have enough energy to keep up with my darling children was one stark realisation. I’m 38 not 5! I just don’t have their energy levels. My philosophy in parenting has been guided by, “energy and empathy” so it took me a while to forgive myself for not being as energetic as I want to be. I have started to look after myself better to keep up that energy but again, I’m 38.
The other huge realisation that hit me with a thump was that the energy and principles by which I am guided – kindness and love – these also need to be mirrored back into myself. I have been focused on sending kindness and love out that I haven’t been so kind or loving to myself, instead I’m increasingly task focused thinking of the dozens of things I need to “tick off the list”.
The list still needs attending to but I’m going to slow down my inner dialogue and breathe a little.
Are you kind to you?