Dear the “just wait” brigade

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Dear the “just wait” brigade,

I get it…you think you’re helping me by telling me that as children grow that try get trickier, more demanding, have their own social lives in a real way. That Saturday’s could be consumed by driving my boys around to various sports, birthday parties, sleep overs and all manner of things I don’t yet foresee.

I understand you think I’m not busy enough in my life and that you think I’m crazy to bake my own bread.

You were the same people who judged me for not “socialising” my kids by sending them to childcare.

But here’s the thing, what you’re criticising me for says more about you than it does me!

I know that life will get busier as my boys grow and go to school. That as they grow their social network they will want to do things more independently from their parents.

I know you love your children you, “just wait” types, just as much as I love mine which is why I don’t say anything when you lecture me so.

Here’s the other thing…I believe that it’s possible I will always want to hang out with my boys. We are raising our children with a set of priorities we believe in – living a life of balance, care, respect and love – for themselves, family members and the world around them. Their lives, like ours, needn’t be full to the brim of activities there must be time for play, creativity and relaxation too.

You see, you “just wait-ers” I’m not wishing away a minute of my little one’s childhoods – yes, even the tantrums – and I know you think you’re helping by telling me how things “could” be but you’re just coming across as jaded and unhappy and well, judgemental.

I know you don’t think I’ve earned my parenting stripes yet you “just wait” types. I have stripes. I have scars even. Being a parent for lesser time doesn’t make me a lesser parent.

Really, I should thank you for helping me foresee the way forward for our little foursome more clearly….instead I’ll just continue to smile at you as you try to beat me down with your opinions and let them wash away.

With gratitude,
Cat.

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10 thoughts on “Dear the “just wait” brigade

  1. The Little Red Hen

    Gawd some people are so SO boring aren’t they. It’s like they are being competitive about who has it the hardest. Which is kind of funny because WHO in their right mind would want to win THAT competition?!

    Reply
    1. The Little Red Hen

      I bet they are the same people who run the ‘Who is the busiest?’ Brigade. If you say things are a bit full-on they will make sure you know that their life is SO much busier than yours.

      Reply
      1. catbeloverly Post author

        Agree K! It’s NOT a competition. I truly believe we should just all get on with living our own best possible life. It’ll leave less room for judgement that way!

  2. Melissa Condren

    Oh so agree! Well written. I have older girls now and I must say I am very conscious to try and not be a mum that says things like this to newer mums. Sometimes it’s just helpful to discover these things yourself. If we want advice well ask

    Reply
  3. Naomi

    Just wait for what? Parenting has challenges. Full stop.
    And if anything, having older children makes things easier, less full on and hectic. Then again, neither of my kids have activities coming out their ears! I love my kids to bits, but the younger years, I’d not go back to them for anything.

    Reply
    1. catbeloverly Post author

      I look to you and your lovelies for an indication of what life may be like for us in the future Naomi, especially as I like your way of seeing the world. I am (clearly!) a little bit over parenting advice like what I’ve been receiving….like their way is the only possible one. Xx

      Reply

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